The New Age of the Black Weeaboo
A fan’s reflections on coming into Anime during quarantine.
This article will alternate between using they/them and he/him pronouns to reflect Ebony’s gender identity.
On a friendly corner of Bedford Stuyvesant, an apartment is overflowing with plant pots tied in Shibari bondage knots and framed NSFW kink art. Warm light illuminates a No Face plushie displayed proudly on the counter separating the kitchen and living room, just right of a bookshelf containing vintage records. Knowing Brooklyn, this may be one of many homes that meet that description. Nevertheless, here Ebony M. emerges to the living room in their cosplay of Misa Amane from Death Note, complete with a little black book labeled with the series’ name. It’s November 1st and after a night of drunk karaoke, he realizes he hadn’t taken any photos of his Halloween costume. “This interview came at a perfect time,” they said. So there I was, giving Misa Misa a photoshoot like my last name is Matsuda. Ebony, who started watching anime this year, laughs when I remind him of when he used to call himself ‘weeaboo-passing’ as opposed to a true weeaboo.
“Now that we’re inside all the time, I said ‘lemme just pick up a new obsession.’”
Weeaboo is generally considered a derogatory term for people who love anime, manga, and other aspects of Japanese culture to a point of obsession. However, in true Millennial/Gen-Z style, people have ironically reclaimed the word to refer to themselves, and Ebony is one of them. He has no shame about his interests, far past feeling insecure about how his interests are viewed in connection with his identities. Ebony embraces all of the things they love tightly. Below, he takes us through his journey of becoming an anime fan during quarantine, embracing his Blackness through anime, and using fandom as a playground to get to know himself and others better.
Stephanie: So, what are you watching now?
Ebony: Right now I’m watching Kakegurui. I’m finishing season 2. I’ve also started Hunter x Hunter, The Disastrous Life of Saiki K, Haikyuu!!, and Naruto — which, as you know, is a lifelong commitment. But watching an anime is half of the experience, like doing the readings for class. The class itself is the fandom content on Ao3, Twitter, and Tumblr. A lot of my free time is spent engaging with fanwork.
S: I know that you started dipping your toes into anime recently. What prompted the interest?
E: A big factor was meeting Black weeaboo friends and seeing how comfortable they are holding those passions alongside their blackness. Of course being in a pandemic, but specifically, moving here. My new roommate said, “I know you don’t like anime, BUT, you should watch Saiki K. — it makes fun of other animes.” And I loooved everything about it. After that, I watched Hunter x Hunter with my sister and by the 5th episode, I was hooked.
I also saw a Black TikTok account call HxH the best anime ever. I said, “Okay, if Black people are saying it, then it must be true!” That’s my logic. From there, I discovered Ao3 and the rest was history.
S: Let’s talk more about that. Ao3, or Archive Of Our Own, is a website people use to read and post fan fiction and fanworks for over 40,000 different fandoms. It has nearly 7 million unique posts. Why do you use Ao3 and other fansites?
E: Sometimes in anime, ideas don’t get explored as much as I would’ve liked or I wish it was done differently. That or the show isn’t finished. Fanfiction is a way to experience different styles or voices for the same material and indulge in all of your fantasies. I like writers that explore embarrassing themes that are hard to talk about. It’s inspiring to see how a character you admire works a problem out.
“You’re able to see how others are vulnerable and express what they want in this fictional world. So then you get braver and think, ‘I can do this for myself too.“
S: Can you give an example of a time you worked out a problem using fanfiction?
E: Haha, yeah I can, but all that’s coming to mind is either BTS or Hisoka and Illumi (from HxH).
S: Either work.
E: Okay, so I made a whole presentation on how reading BTS stories on Ao3 has helped me approach my own vulnerabilities. For example, I recently recognized I want to explore polyamory. My first reaction was to read BTS fanfiction about it since it’s so hard to find books about polyamory written with people of color in mind. I then dissociate to read the fanfiction — and I call it that because I’m separating the problem from myself to explore it in fictional worlds with these people or characters I know.
You’re able to see how others are vulnerable and express what they want in this fictional world. And how they’re accepted and no one turns them away. So then you get braver and think, “I can do this for myself too.” I think fanfiction is a great tool for reprogramming yourself when you’ve been heavily mistreated and you’re not able to trust your feelings. It’s helped me understand how I should be treated, become a better friend to others, and a better person to myself.
“I used to think I needed to own my Blackness by ‘being Black.’ But like… what does that even mean? I’m Black so literally, everything I already do is Black. Black people are the largest, most diverse diaspora. Everything can exist in Blackness.”
S: What does it mean to you to find other Black anime fans?
E: I don’t have any other words to say other than it’s the ONLY thing that matters to me. Seeing Black weebs, K-pop stans, and cosplayers help me accept myself as an alternative Black person. I think sometimes when Black people adopt “Black traits” that aren’t natural to them, that can be a form of appropriation. Like, I was raised in white areas for half of my upbringing. I used to think I needed to own my Blackness by “being Black.” But like…what does that even mean? I’m Black so literally, everything I already do is Black. Black people are the largest, most diverse diaspora. Everything can exist in Blackness.
I get a lot of inspiration from a Black guy in my high school that dressed up as Naruto, like, every week. Like, just living life. Also, TikTok helps a lot because most of my meme content on there are Black weebs. I like how open people are now about it. Gender was also part of the shame — it felt like just guys were allowed to like anime when I was growing up.
S: That gendered legacy persists today in popular portrayals of Black anime fans. Like, the abundance of cis-gendered Black men that watch One Piece, Dragonball Z, Naruto, and ask who you think can win a fight against Goku.
E: Yeah. Now that we’re talking about it, that’s why exposure to different genres helped. My first introduction to anime was obviously Shonen, which I’m not always about. Being hyper-aware of the sexualization of women, especially underaged girls, made me uncomfortable. Seeing that alongside perceiving cis-men as the audience turned me off. That’s why Saiki K. caught my eye, because of the funny skits and little to no action. It opened my mind to what other anime could look like — ones that aren’t tainted by hyper-masculine figures I knew growing up.
S: Can we talk more about your experience with fandom growing up? Before anime and K-pop.
E: Honestly, I’ve never been good at interacting in fandom, even when I was into big band fandoms like 5 Seconds Of Summer or when I was a heavy Tumblr user. TikTok was my first introduction to fandom. Which is really sad. I feel like it’s easier when you’re in high school.
S: So what changed for you when you started watching anime?
E: What changed is finishing college and being in a pandemic, but I’ve also realized I’m past my time of desiring online friends. That’s because of my own need to feel grounded in our physical world. So even though online fandoms are a great resource and I appreciate the time when I had online friends, I really want to focus on creating in-person relationships.
S: I also feel like the Internet has changed. It used to be formatted as a more collaborative space that had plenty of interest-based forums. For example, when Tumblr was popular you could easily find and interact with other people. Now the popular platforms are user-profile-based, making it harder to find people.
E: That’s so true. I hate to keep bringing TikTok into this, but it works just like Tumblr. You can curate your feed to your interests and search tags. Of course, that’s an option on Instagram and Twitter, but what’s refreshing about TikTok is that there are two sections to your feed: people you follow, and recommended posts. The recommended feed is what you see first when you open the app. The interface lets you interact with content, unlike Instagram, which is focused on the people you follow.
S: It also recommends random people with few followers sometimes. On other platforms, celebrities and influencers are the ones that randomly end up on your feed.
E: Exactly. Black creatives don’t get the credit and attention that they deserve. On TikTok, I can see someone with only 200 likes that makes bomb memes! Still, R.I.P. Tumblr. Its format made you feel like you can message with a person, ask questions, and do Q&A’s. There is a specific hole in our media platforms today. Some sites have the potential to create spaces that explode with fandom connection. Like Ao3.
They are the biggest fanfiction site, thousands and thousands — it IS an archive for real. If Ao3 had an app for phones and tablets or an interface that was conducive to conversation, it could grow exponentially. So many people go on there and you’re all reading the same thing! Imagine being able to talk about your ideas. Or what if there was a way to recommend fanfiction based on ones you’ve given kudos? There’s so much exploration and conversation that can happen after that.
S: I’m interested in the conversation from earlier, about affirming yourself as an alternative Black person by embracing passions like anime. Do you think Black people can use anime as a tool for reimagining realities? Knowing the cons, but also knowing the pros.
E: Hmm, I’m not sure. Creativity and pleasure are essential to revolution and liberation. As well as mental elasticity, the ability to hold two conflicting ideas simultaneously. Some anime do explore complex ideas in interesting ways. Like the Chimera Ant Arc in Hunter x Hunter: as soon as you’re comfortable defining good and bad, it blurs the lines. I see anime, manga, and Ao3 as playgrounds to explore these ideas and help us practice relevant skills.
But for the reasons we’ve discussed, it’s hard to see that. Anime is part of a global market, so it can hold any number of themes relevant to liberation, but I haven’t seen one follow through until the end. So it depends on what we use it for; fanfiction, fanart, TikToks. I haven’t read any fanfics that I specifically know were written by Black people — again, Ao3’s interface not being user friendly, displaying profile pictures could help with this. But that’s why I don’t know if it’s an effective tool. But who knows, maybe that’s just the limit of my own creativity! Who knows. For us to turn it into a tool that can help us in our liberation, it might just become something else entirely.
Ebony (they/he) is nonbinary Gen-Z legend from Queens. You can find them dancing, playing french horn, Aquarius musing, pursuing radical community, and scheming at the New School.
Feel free to say hi to Ebony at @blackpowerqueerthot on Instagram.
